Back to Utah

This is Axel again. After the trip to Seattle and saying goodbye to Danny, Linda and Karen there, we came back down for the last week of the trip. It is so tough to be in the last week. Each day brings you closer back to reality. This leg of the trip was geared for friends. My best friend from EL, Dave Alizo "Bizz" came to visit me. During his trip we went to go see MoTab as he is a big music fan and tour around Temple Square on his last day. We also went hunting in Manti and drove up to the mountains. It was all great.
I remember standing there with 4 fewer kids, 4 fewer school degrees, a lot less money and yet still the same hot, young wife I had on my marriage day. How did I change and she only got better?
This is Dave, My Mom and Xay after the Spoken Word concert. It was amazing to see them live in the conference center. It was my first time in the conference center and I was moved to tears a few times it was so beautiful. Dave turned to me a few times and told me things about MoTab I didn't even know. He loved it too.
Honestly I can't say enough about my relationship with Dave. We met in high school on the freshmen football bench. I was short and fat and Dave was bigger and protective. We laughed there and started hanging out from then on. I am not one for many friends. I like lots of people, but I am very guarded about who I let in as a friend. I guess that is primarily becuase I started off with such a great one. I know there is nothing Dave wouldn't do for me and the same is true of me. It kills me to live so far away from him. I have no secrets from him and I always get the best advice about anything big or small. If you know him, than I am quiet sure you love him. He was like a second big brother to all my brothers and sisters, and his mom is one of the most amazing people I know. She raised him to be 'old school'. He holds doors, is always respectful to older people (which is getting harder and harder for us to find) and is always great to little children. He speaks Spanish like a native, but didn't start even learning it until after high school, he composes his own music (he is starting a fusion of blue grass and Latin music now that sounds amazing!) and all of it he just taught himself becuase he wanted to. All of this isn't even the tip of the iceberg about him - I could write a whole book on the subject. I love him like a brother.
I also had the great opportunity to touch bases with my fellow Jerusalem Center Intesive Arabic class of 1993. This get together was put together by my great friend Todd Cummings (on the far left), who was my roommate there. So he has a bit of dirt on me... He was my best friend there and we have stayed great friends ever since. He has since become a corporate trainer for his own company he started and comes to the ME often (actually he will be back here for some more training this month and we are so looking forward to seeing him again!) He invited a few of the other Arabic students and our teacher for 6 months; Dan Peterson and his wonderful wife Debbie and two of their three sons.

If you are Mormon then you have probably heard of Dan Peterson. He does a lot of projects from defending the church, working closely with FARMS and still teaching Arabic at BYU. The guy speaks like 10 languages and a few of them are dead ones (honestly, who still understands Akkadian?). Let me just tell you, if you only know him from his writings and genius, then you don't know the greatest thing about the guy and his family. When I came to Jerusalem I had just experienced the death of my two brothers Asa and Calder. My dad had a head wound and my mom was dealing with some seriously hard issues. When I got to the J Center, I had hair down past my shoulders, wore my leather motorcycle jacket around and already had an Israeli girlfriend who was in the IDF (I came a week early). Honestly, I was a mess dealing with the loss of my family in more ways than one.

Dan and his wife Debbie stepped right in to be more than teachers, they became a second family. I look back and at that time and he was younger then than I am now. He was always there for me. He overlooked the things I did wrong and praised me for the few things I could do right. His wife always gave me hugs (which I needed in the worst way) but also didn't have any problems telling me when I was out of line. And his three sons were there to help me play with and deal with the loss of my two younger brothers. I just love his family and it was so nice to see them all again.

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Back to Terah to complete this blog. Ugh, sorry. We are manic these days with catching up and all...

Also while we were in Utah we visited with my sister-in-law Shauna. She is one of the most pleasant people you will ever meet. Her heart is big and her strength is amazing. Although her and my brother are divorced, I won't accept the fact that she is not my sister. I have too much love and admiration for her. While in college I was poor and directionless. Shauna and Chad opened their doors for me and allowed for me to live with them for years. Yes, years. I don't know if I could ever do that for a family member. She had so much patience when my boyfriends would call late and night and wake her babies, or when I would come home in the wee hours at night and no matter how hard I tried, those wood floors would creek so loud I swore I woke their neighbors 5 doors down. I think of the carefree college-aged Terah and I quite sure I would have kicked her out after the first month. Not Shauna.

Instead, she always emphasized that family was first and that I was always welcomed in her home. For that, I will always be indebted to her. Her home was always a place of refuge for me whenever I was lonely or missed my family back in Canada. I could count on her to open her doors and allow me all the freedom that a young 20 something needed. These examples barely scratch the surface for all that Shauna has done for me and my family. I love her so much and I was so blessed to see her in Utah. Currently she is an airline stewardess and seems to really love what she does. I couldn't be happier for her.

As my children grow older I am fascinated by the other 50% of them that isn't me. So many parts of them are curious to me and sometimes surprise me. It is one of the joys of my life to watch my children behave or act in a totally different manner than myself. Sometimes this is positive, sometimes not. Whatever it may be, it intrigues me and makes life more exciting. I think I always thought I would just have clones of myself, which is a rather scary thought and thank goodness it didn't work out that way.

One of the interesting things that came from my trip to Utah was to see the other 50% manifest itself in other children or adults in Axel's family. Whether it was a physical trait or personality trait, it was so much fun to see the genetic overlap of the cousins and siblings. I never got to look at my progeny in such a way as I did while I was in Utah. Seeing the children find similarity (spoken or unspoken) was such an eye opening thing not only for me, but also my children.

Luckily, I married well. My husband has a lovely family full of quirks and strengths that are exceptional on both sides of the scale. They have big hearts, they have an affinity for nature, they excel in scholastics, they cook well, they tolerate chaos, they love conversation, they empathize, they forgive, they discuss politics, they play instruments, they are faithful, they love little children, they execute plans, etc. It was delightful to see how those strengths played out in Axel's family and how I found similarities in myself and also differences. It was a joy to make connections in my children that I never knew before. It was a discovery that was beautiful and surprising. I found that so many of Axel's family's qualities were reflected in my children that I admire, I love and I am thankful.

It is a divine thing to see how God can perpetuate the great strengths from one generation to another. I am proud that I chose well enough to have my children inherit such wonderful qualities. For example, Anna, Axel's sister had us live in her home for over 3 weeks. That seems like a natural familial duty to most until you find out that she has 7 children of her own, two of which are barely a year old. Her family's kindness and generosity was overwhelming. This example and a billion more exist with Axel's family. They are a strong, intelligent and engaging group of people who can be kind, loving and forgiving. I am just lucky enough to have elements of that reflected in my own home, 4 times over.

Keith, Anna, baby Ada, Sedona and baby Gabe

Seattle's Best

Axel has always wanted a home in British Columbia, and yet, he had never actually been there. As soon as we decided to go to Utah, he couldn't help but book a ticket for the Northwest so he could actualize his dreams. My great friend Karen happens to live in Seattle so we planned a trip to Vancouver Island via Seattle. One of the main reasons Axel loves this area is that we went to visit Karen and Steve in September 2001. We fished on the Puget Sound, visited Friday Harbor and slept on a boat while admiring the phosphorescence in the ocean. Magical.

Luckily, Karen and Steve still live in the Northwest and it was so fantastic visiting and catching up with them. Karen drove us all over to explore the Seattle sites with her 6 year old triplets and her 9 year old daughter. I was sad we didn't have all of our kids with us. We knew they would be too preoccupied with the cousin fun back in Utah and Axel's family was willing to watch them while we were gone (bless them!), so we decided to only take Sedona. I am not sure our logic in taking Sedona, but it might just be that she is a great travel companion.

We explored Seattle in a big way.

1. Went to the S.A.M (Seattle Art Museum) and was pleasantly surprised.

Outside of SAM with our clan. While walking through the market we were asked if we were Mormon from a complete stranger. I am not sure what gave it away the 5 young kids, or the one man with his two wives.

My favorite Rothco

Axel's expression in reaction to Pollock's expression.

The American art exhibit was my favorite. The contrasts of dark and light were mesmerizing.

I think the most surprising exhibit for Axel and me was the British Columbian native art. The totem poles were massive and the facial expressions were freak-hey.

2. Visited the Farmer's Market an saw a place where fish fly.

Axel's one wish was that we would eat plenty of seafood while in Seattle. Karen made all of his dreams come true when she took us to the best fish place in the market. Not only did you get salmon, you also got a show. Huge fish flew in the air and the guys running the show were young, cute and comical.

More cherries please. I believe I ate an entire tree's yield of Rainier cherries. By the end of my trip to the US, my body was begging me to not eat one more cherry.

3. Visited the Space Needle and had no desire to go on top.

...but we did get loads of photos of cute kids in front of the landmark.

4. Ate the maximum amount of seafood our stomachs could handle.

I avoid throwing up at all costs, but I was almost tempted to force myself immediately after this meal just so I could do it all over again.

5. Cherished every second I had with Karen.

Karen and I were college roommates and have remained close friends ever since. She is an amazing woman and I am so happy to know her and call her friend. We have always been there for each other during the highs (babies, marriage, etc.) and the lows (brain tumor, triplets, etc). If I collected all my emails to Karen, it would be a full, complete journal. She has always been an amazing friend for book recommendations, workout advice, funny stories that are way too embarrassing to tell anyone close by, and pure honesty.

If I wasn't leaving for Africa tomorrow, I would be tempted to put up a before (college years) and after (as in now) photo. I just saved you from being blinded by the white skin, over bleached hair, and puffy bangs. You can thank me later.

It would be great to find at house up that way simply because I would be closer to Karen during the summers. But, even if we don't, we have proven distance and time doesn't change us much. In fact, we have only improved with time. Some friends just stick. For me, Karen is one of them. Thanks for the fun, Karen! It was such a blast!

More hunting in Manti

Axel's family has some strong roots in Manti. That is where he would go as a young child to visit his grandparents and go hunting. Whenever he had a bad day at work, I do believe Manti was his happy place for a mental respite. That is why I think everyone enjoyed simply watching Axel in Manti. Of the 13 years we have been together, this was the strongest glimpse of my husband's childhood. He was a kid in a candy store. I mean a big one, with tons of acreage and unlimited spending money.

After 4 years of being away from the US, Axel finally planned his Manti hunting trip. The hunting gods were smiling upon Axel during his Manti excursion because within no time at all, Axel caught 3 gopher snakes, which was quite impressive. However, what I found much more interesting was the reaction of all the Bromley progeny. No one--I repeat-- not one child (of which there were 17) was scared of the snakes. In fact, the children were actively fighting to see who could hold the snake the longest.

Gopher snakes were not the only prize of the trip. Axel's brother also shot a jack rabbit. (For what purpose, my female brain can not understand). I am told that was also a big deal, because it happened swiftly and with one shot. 'Good job', I said, and went back to eating my licorice in the van.

Asa was quickly turned on to the idea of hunting. So much so that he decided he would mark his territory.

"Let all man, child, and infant know (like my father declared many years ago): I will be back!"

Shylock

Today we had to say goodbye to a family member who has been with us over 13 years. I have never felt a loss so strongly as I have today. My eyes are swollen shut and I feel like there isn’t an ounce of liquid left in my body. I am devastated.

At the Croatian coast with Mario (Shylock's frequent babysitter and friend)

It is amazing what you take for granted everyday. All the pieces in your life are in place and you feel like it is just supposed to be that way, as if there are no other factors that can disrupt your universe. All the pieces are especially important for someone who has a mild case of OCD like me. Pillows with feather duvet--check. Children playing in the background--check. Workout clothes neatly folded in the closet--check. Dog sleeping quietly by my side--check. It all tells me that it is my life and everything is in its proper place.

The innocence of being newly married with an adorable dog.

Today the universe shifted. It moved in a way that is unfamiliar to me. I see my pillow, I see my children, I even wore my workout clothing, but there is no doggie by my bedside. Everything has been turned upside down. For 13 years now, I have depended on that sweet little dog to be by my side as I sleep, or greet me at the door when I arrive home. There is an empty spot in my life that I can’t change.

Christmas in Croatia

Only months after Axel and I were married we moved to Croatia. Axel had a job with an NGO and I took my last year of BYU in a huge duffle bag hoping to be the first graduate of BYU home study overseas. I had 13 classes to go and a year of nothing to do but study. I knew it was going to be lonely as I worked day in and day out on my assignments.

Catching lizards in Croatia

As a result, Axel and I both decided that I needed a companion. I needed a diversion to kept me sane during that full year of intense self-motivation and discipline. I grew up with a Yorkie dog, Romeo, and adored him. He didn’t care for me much. In fact, I don’t know how many countless times I was bitten by the rascal, but truth be told, I probably deserved it. I was hoping that this time around I could try again and win the love of a Yorkie. Finding a Yorkie was the next challenge. It was no small feat. Split, Croatia was a tiny city and there weren’t too many Yorkies on the pet trade.

By a small twist of fate we found a lady who sold Yorkies. She had a litter of 6 week old puppies who melted my heart the minute I saw them. We pondered the idea of having a puppy and made the decision that this would be something good for me. Just days after we bought Shylock we started to worry when we reflected on the size of his mom. She was a large Yorkie mutt and well over 10 kilos. (Shylock’s dad was supposedly a tiny Italian show dog, but we never actually saw him). We didn’t want a large dog and we both thought we should bring Shylock back to the seller.

Sedona, Arizona

That night, Shylock slept in our bed with us (as he did for many years later). He was so cozy, cute and sweet. It was like he knew we were thinking of taking him back. The next morning we both agreed that he was the dog for us. I have never regretted my decision to keep him since (not to mention the fact that he has never weighed over 3 kilos, ever.) He was my bestest friend during that year. We took him everywhere. I carried a toy pup in my arms long before Paris Hilton ever made the look trendy. The Croatians loved him and many of them knew him by name. He loved to promenade along the corniche.

Heavah 3 months old with Shylock.

Since that time, Shylock has been a light in our lives. We took him everywhere. I never shopped or drove anywhere without him. I went through a number of purses that could inconspicuously house Shylock so I could grocery shop or take him to work without a single person knowing. His warm body was a little extension of me. Nothing was more fun than to see a person’s shock after Shylock would poke his tiny head out and reveal himself. Everyone loved him.

Visiting Salem, MA 8 months pregnant with Heavah

Shylock was with Axel and I for 5 years before we even thought about having children. He filled any void we may have had while I finished my undergrad, began my graduate studies, and worked full-time putting Axel through graduate school. We were those weird people who treated our dog like a child and made no apologies for it. I still don’t. He was the perfect thing to have in our lives while we worked hard to set up our future. I know God placed him in our lives at the right time and in the right way.

Weeks after Axel's brain surgery, Heavah 11 months old, I am 9 months pregnant with Xavier

We have had so many incredible memories with Shylock. He used to chase chinchillas in our apartment while we lived in Croatia. His instincts of being a rat killer really came out. Axel and I would be entertained for hours as we saw the cat and mouse routine between Shylock and our pet chinchilla. Shylock would go to the islands with us often and run along the Croatian coastline. He moved from place to place with us and was always a trusted companion. He has lived in 6 different countries and has experienced more in his little doggie life than most adult humans.

Puja'ed in Nepal

I have dreaded this day from the beginning. I have feared that I would have to be the one to make the choice. It was extremely hard, but necessary. He is free from his ailments now. He can frolic in a much happier place surrounded by freedom and love. My heart aches. It is pained and I dislike this feeling more than anything. I wish I could have him by my side forever, but the fragility of life is apparent and I have to let go. His memory will always be honored in our home. He gave so much more than he received. My life has been forever changed by the unconditional love of a 3-pound Yorkie and the world is a little less bright because he is no longer in it.

Shylock and his favorite toy, 'the piggie'

We love you Shylock, and look to the day when we can be reunited again.

My 'Little' Brother Brad

This is Axel again. When Terah and I lived in AZ getting our masters degrees I was called to be the YMP for our ward. During that time I got to know this 11 - 12 year old kid named Brad. Several things about him really struck me. Firstly he really reminded me of my brother Asa. He had a drive to be a pilot and even at 12 he was doing everything in his power to make it happen. I have never seen a kid or even an adult with such a clear and concise goal doing everything that needed to be done to make it a reality. And he was funny. Terah and I loved having him around the house and he would come over often to go herping with me, get help on his homework, work on his boy scouts or just hang out. It was like having a little brother again.

We have kept in contact since we left AZ and over the years talked and seen each other when we get the chance. He never once changed his goals or the great kid he was. I was always proud of him. He served his mission in Hong Kong and his big brother Jeremy (another stellar kid) served his mission in Croatia and actually lived in the same town Terah and I were in where I was the branch president all those year ago.

Brad was accepted to the Air Force Academy and is close to graduating now we are praying for him to get a pilot's slot.

When he had a spring break and wrote he was thinking about coming to see us here we were soo happy. He showed up and here are some picts of the great week we had together:

Brad and Xay in Chitwan washing an elephant. He is no longer little! The guy is like 6'2 and solid muscle!

We went on a jeep safari and saw rhinos, spotted and musk deer, storks, sloth bears, guars, gharials, crocodiles and a caged man eating tiger. It was a great trip.

There was a forest fire going on. They are freaking loud!

Wild peacock flying away

Dona giving an elephant a Pringle chip. They also can't just eat one.

So he reached his trunk into the car to get to the source of the chips.

So Xay rewarded him with a few more and a couple of bananas so he would get fat.

Man eating crocodiles seen from a boat ride we took.

Brad hanging out at the elephant nursery.

Seeing wild rhinos on the back of a elephant. I was on the another elephant taking the picture.

Look up on the tree branch. There is an Indian Monitor Lizard almost to the top. A rare sight.

Then because I had just turned 40 and we wanted to see if we could scare some life out of me, Terah, Me and Brad went bungee jumping off of the bridge you see. 545 feet straight down! It was a blast and Brad was the gung ho Air Force man who led us to do it. Terah is going to post a separate post about that later.

Me and Brad and the valley of doom after the jump. Yeah baby we didn't die!

Brad hanging out with some of the local hill people.

We saw this old man walking down the road so Brad jumped out to give him something to drink, eat and some money for a picture. Just a little bit of size difference!

This is just at Pashupati, where they cremate the dead. Brad is majoring in Biology (another reason he is soo cool) at the academy and so he wanted to get a sample of the water to test it to see what is in it. We can't wait to hear the results!

Heavah, Hanuman (the monkey god of Rama) and Brad

Yep, that is a dead body ready to get burned.

And here it is starting. You can see the flames coming out of the mouth. That is where the fire is started. This person must have been important to be burned here.

Brad cold chill'n with the natives. After this he taught them how to do the 5 step hi five slap.

Another weird dude.

And then too soon it was over.

Brad went on a date with our maid. She is still madly in love with him and talks about him all the time.

It was such a fun trip. They guy had Terah and I laughing full belly laughs every day he was here. It was like chicken soup for our souls to have him here. I couldn't be more proud of the man he has become. Nor could I be prouder to have him as an adopted younger brother. He brings happiness and smiles wherever he goes. I can't wait to see him again.

Miss you bro! Come back soon!