Utah Actually

My trip to Utah was so unexpected and spontaneous I had little time to process the idea. One minute I am home, the next I am in a sleep induced comma, cramped next to a smelly, fat man for 20 hours. And when I awoke? Voila! I am in Salt Lake City, Utah. It is marvelous how that works. I decided to take Heavah for the fun of it. She was a perfect traveling companion. 8 really is great. No diapers, no bottles, no puke, and no complaints. She sat next to me watching movie after movie, and at the appropriate times, she would fall asleep. The only thing she requested before every flight was for me to tell her how many hours we would be on that particular plane. Whether I told her it was 9 or 3, she would always respond, 'Oh, okay'. That girl was born to travel, or she was born traveling. One or the other.

I would be lying if I said I did not experience serious culture shock. Surprisingly, this was much worse than the trip I took back in '09 from Nepal. I don't know what made it so difficult, but man, I thought I was on another planet. Everything seemed different and I could not get over how strange my life seemed compare to those in Utah. Where's the maid? Obnoxious Land Cruiser drivers? Huge round abouts? Sand? One factor could have been that I had peeked into so many American lives when viewing homes. So many kids, so much cuteness, so many choices, so much blonde!!!

We stayed with my sister-in-law Anna. What an amazing person to welcome us warmly into her home when her plate was plenty full. Not only is she a mother of 7, but she is also a mother of toddler twins! Albeit the sweetest, easiest, cutest toddler twins ever, but still. It was complete kindness and charity on her part. Plus, she was also so understanding of the fact that I was consumed by house hunting so she made Heavah's experience in Utah incredibly comfortable and fun. I believe there were a couple of days that I didn't even see Heavah because she was engaged in so many activities. It is great to have such a fantastic sister-in-law who obviously loves us a whole bunch. She's awesome.

Heavah loved being in Utah. She went on and on about the beauty of the country and the mountains, oh, the mountains! She experienced snow, hail, and rain and all the cousin love she could desire. I do believe she thinks Emma is her soul sister. Heavah shadowed Emma everywhere Emma went and got to sleep in her room! A sleepover every single night? Pure heaven.

Heavah also got to spend alone time with her Grandma and discussed art, visited museums and, ate dinner at a fancy shmancy restaurant. It was great to reconnect that link. Doing it thousands of miles away is tough. I am sure this trip has been burned into Heavah's memory. She was able to notice subtle cultural differences and it provoked a lot of questions. It was fun to see America through her eyes.

House hunting was way more difficult than I had expected. First, the housing market is depressing. Rarely will you find a house where the seller is simply relocating. The number of 'short sales' or 'foreclosures' are astonishing. Second, for those who are losing their home, they don't want to make it easy for you to come take a look. I don't know how many people denied us entry despite the fact that we made an appointment. Third, the houses that are vacant typically have been stripped of cupboards, carpet, fixtures--you name it. I guess the previous owner figures if he or she is going to lose the house anyways, might as well get something out of it. A souvenir, or stealing? You decide.

By the end of my trip each house was starting to look the same and I was completely tired of the whole process. When you know you are never going to live in the house it takes out a lot of the excitement. It is merely a business transaction. I had to fight within myself over and over again. What the hell am I looking for exactly? Am I seeking out a cash cow, or something that I am proud to own? This caused great conflict within me, and many heated discussions with Axel.

Despite my petering, I believe we have found our home. It took a lot of searching and a lot of pain in the process, but I think I found something that will accomplish both. I will post pictures soon. At the moment, I can't for fear that I will jinx it. If we get it, it will be fabulous. If not, I have a whole list of other homes we can make offers on. Something will pan out. Something.

A home that I LOVED but it was not the traditional 'Utah' home. In fact, it was very, very funky inside. It was so eclectic and interesting that it belonged in Barcelona or Singapore, not Utah. There was nothing predictable inside the home and it had loads of character. If I was purchasing a home for me, this is the one I would buy. BUT, I am not. Instead, I had to think about a Bountiful resident (where this house was located, right by the big 'B ' up on the mountain). No one from Bountiful would want to live in this house, unless he/she was gay or extremely eccentric and how many of those live in the city of Bountiful, really. Do you see my dilemma?

When I arrived home from our trip there were issues with our financing. Banks are really tightening up their laws and our overseas situation is a underwriter's nightmare. So many hoops (for example, our credit is affected by the fact that we have not made a purchase on our credit card in the states for years and years. Strangely, you have to have debt in order to get a mortgage. We don't. What to do?). There were a couple of moments there that I wondered if the trip was all for nothing. If we didn't get a house, or at least the one of my choosing, why the heck did I go in the first place? I could then easily reassure myself that the trip was fruitful by the mere fact that Heavah and I got to spend quality time with Axel's family. It was a great time, with great people. Can't wait for this summer!

When Life Gives You Lemons....

During the winter break Heavah was desperate for things to do. She was also anxious to make a little cash. Economics are dawning on her and she is ready to play the game. After a long brainstorm session she decided to start selling lemonade.

Below you can see her 5 sample cups. She feels one must try the product before he or she commits. She also conducted a focus group to decide what a cup of lemonade was worth. She went from 5 Riyals ($1.50) down to 2 Riyals (.50 cents) per cup--much to her dismay.

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Her final challenge was finding customers. It wasn't until she moved her picnic kiosk to the clubhouse that she really made hard cold cash. 500 Riyals ($150. USD) to be exact. It helps to have wealthy expat neighbors who have a soft spot for cute white girls.

Since the lemonade stand Heavah held a yard sale for all the clothing I was going to donate. She is also brewing up an idea for a cookie business. She is ready to go, but I am not sure I can commit. She plans on visiting the neighbors, providing samples, and taking orders. It is serious business.

Heavah's goal? An iPhone.

That's a whole lotta lemons and cookies. * iPhones in the Middle East are approximately $950. USD. And yet, we are closer to China. Hummm.....

Memory Lane - Illegal Style

Family photo taken in the same spot as Family Photo circa 2009

Asa is still just as uncooperative

We had to visit our old stomping grounds when we returned to Nepal. I was lucky enough to sneak in when I went on girlcation a month before. This time, when we arrived, everything was locked up. Did that stop the Bromleys? Nah.

After we got in--past the lock gates and guard dogs--we looked at each other and thought, 'Wait 'a sec. The whole time we lived here...'

The gardens were well kept despite the fact that the house was vacant. Axel inspected every inch and identified all the things that had changed. The ghosts of cages and pheasants were ever so present.
The play area was nicely paved, but lacked the fun of our jungle gym.

Even Axel's orchids were flourishing.

I think if we all had a choice, we would move right back in. That is, only if we had our day and night time guards back. It appears that crazy people can just walk right in.

Returning Home

Visiting my home. Not much has changed except it is missing my children riding their bikes and our 100 chickens.

Axel's Zen garden today.

Nepal took me by surprise this time. I never thought it would be such an emotional ride. While waiting for my friends to arrive from the Everest flight, I found myself welling up thinking about my life there and all the memories that I cherish. My driver joined me in the cryfest as he thought about Sedona coming outside every morning calling for her 'dai, dai'. We sat reminiscing of all the fun memories we shared together. It was unexpected and bittersweet.

Afton with Kumari girls

I have never been so connected to a physical place like Nepal. It spoke to me the minute I first arrived off the plane and I have never been the same since. I have told Axel that if I die, I would like to be cremated (however NOT in Pashupati) and I want my ashes to be spread throughout Nepal. It is a morbid way of me wanting to be back in the country I love. Plus, the extra dust would mix in just fine.

I think the reason why I have such love for Nepal is because it stretched me. For the first time, everyday life required strategy and creativity. Simply buying groceries was a feat. There was no neighborhood Albersons or Smiths. First, I had to go to the meat shop, then on to the fruit and veggie market, and finally, to the store that sold can and dried goods. Even my rice had to be purchased in a special section of town. For many people this would be an annoyance. But for me, it was an enticing challenge.

Lovely ladies in Patan

Life in Nepal was void of commercialism and competition. I don't think I ever thought about how I looked or what others thought of me (which is very apparent from all of my photos during that time). My worries were focused on whether we would be warm for the evening, or could I bathe my children in that water, or would the food spoil after 18 hours of no electricity? Strategic thinking was always in play. Rarely, if ever, did I ponder the color of my eye shadow or whether my house was clean enough.

A lot of my focus shifted during my time in Nepal. My family became such an important priority in my life because we only had each other. I also had more time to teach my kids and there was a lot of hands-on learning. My children rarely, if ever, watched television. (We often had no electricity anyways). Instead, my kids would learn about skinning a chicken, experiencing the cycle of life, or planting their own food. It came down to the basics. And basic living it was.

Nepal pushed me to deeply connect with my creative self. When I needed clothing for my children, I didn't have the option of driving to the mall and picking up something cute. Instead, I had to sketch something out, buy the fabric, and take it to a tailor. My creative juices were constantly flowing. It challenged me to look outside of, 'Oh I like that, let me buy it'. I was able to create something in my mind and do all the leg work that was required for it to be actualized, whether it was a sofa cover, a piece of furniture, or a piece of jewelry. I found that my right brain was in constant motion. I loved tapping into that, something that isn't nearly alive in me as it used to.

I think I love Nepal so much because I loved the me in Nepal. I loved the me that could get my hands dirty and explore the jungle, I loved the me that would be willing to jump off a bridge, and I loved the me that found opportunities to serve. Had I not lived in Nepal, I would probably not have known that side of me, as a mother, wife, individual, and citizen of the world.

Visiting Sarita's family. They hosted a very special Tihar puja for my gang. The generosity and kindness was immense.

Most importantly, I miss my children and family in Nepal. I miss the unique experiences we had there and the relationships that we developed. We have reminisced about our lives in Nepal several times since we have moved to Qatar. We are often moved from laughter to tears as we recall the many joyful experiences we had there. Inevitably, the conversation ends with the kids smiling, sighing, and then saying, 'I wish we were still there...'

The lessons I learned in Nepal are many--too many to list. But, the most important one I learned is that I am fortunate. No one can drive the streets of Kathmandu or visit a Nepali village without feeling overwhelmed with gratitude and thanks. While I lived there, I felt that way every single day. This was not because I had material wealth, because anyone can obtain that. Instead, it was because I was fortunate enough to live in such a beautiful country, with beautiful people, living a beautiful life. For that, I am truly blessed.

PS - More can be read about our girlcation adventures on Afton's site here.

Why I Like Doha - Reason #1

During the summer, half the population in the Middle East disappears. The minute school is out, everyone leaves for their home country or ventures off to a much cooler place. For some reason, each summer I am in the Middle East, I find myself stuck here with nowhere to go. I am either pregnant or about to move. When I found out that we were moving to Qatar almost a year ago, I dreaded this time of year.

The anticipation of this summer brought me great anxiety. The thought of having all my kids at home, in an ice box, unable to leave, seemed like torture. Most of their friends are gone and we are here to fend for ourselves.

However, something miraculous has happened. The summer here has been completely comfortable for a number of reasons. I have found a new appreciation for Doha, and I don't seem to mind it here so much. In fact, I am trying to focus on the great things of Qatar, because inevitably, we will be off to a new adventure.

Why I love Doha:

Reason #1

My compound gym

This state-of-the-art gym is all mine at any time of the day. I also have a sauna and steam room to relax in after my daily routine. It seems a little strange sitting in a sweat room that is probably cooler than outside, but that is where I allow the coconut oil settle in my hair and read the Ensign. It is heaven to me.

I also have the luxury of running on the treadmill while watching my kids burn out some of their energy or fight over who gets the dolphin floaty.

Stay tuned for the following #9 reasons. Try to contain your excitement.

Peacekeeper

Heavah keeps her younger brother (of only 11 months and 29 days) and his friends in line. She has very little tolerance for disobedience or childish behavior as can be seen in this letter hanging on Xavier's door:

In case you can't read the above notice:

The things you are not aloud to do in Xavier's room!

* Don't make a mess!

* No food aloud.

* No hurting!!!

*No dangrous things ALOUD!!!!!!

*Panting is inaproprit in this room

*Inaproprit dancing, playing, showings, languige is not aloud in his room

Thank you for READING!!

Thank YOU for reading.

Singing and Stuff

Heavah's concert was last week and it involved a lot of singing and dancing. I must say, for as much oil money that is poured into this school (Shell, Exxon, etc. all offer plenty of cash to keep the school top notch), the theater program pales in comparison to Nepal. The most interesting part was what Heavah said after the concert:

"Mom, I must say that kind of singing isn't really my style."

AND

Heavah: Mom, I felt a little strange dancing in circles on the stage. When my back was to everyone I was worried about my butt.

Me: Why would you say that?

Heavah: I just know I have a big butt and I kept trying to squeeze it so it didn't looks so big.

Me: Why would you think that your butt is big?

Heavah: I know I have dad's body, and he has a huge butt.

Those of you who know Axel well are smiling right now.

Xavier and Heavah's school has officially ended and summer has begun! In celebration, I am taking Heavah to Dubai tomorrow. (Xavier got a Wii, so he is content playing many mindless hours of games this weekend.) I was tempted to extend the trip to Thailand. They are giving away flights and hotels. But, I am burnt out of traveling. Yes, I said it. I am burnt out.

Ending of a Preschool Era

Next week is our last week of preschool. When it was my final turn to teach my friend asked, "Are you sad?" My gut reaction was, "Heck no!" But when all the kids drove off and I packed up the preschool bin, there was a moment of sadness. I am actually going to really miss the group of kids we have. They all get along and they can each quote each other's favorite color. There is a sweet bond between all of them and it has been magical to witness.

What I didn't know was this week was Amber's turn to teach but due to a snafu with her visa for China, I got to teach again. There wasn't a lot of teaching. More like, wrestling, jumping, duck-duck-goosing, and princess playing. I enjoyed myself so much I wondered who had more fun--me or the kids.

I can't help but wonder where the kids will be 18 years from now. After an unlikely connection in Doha, where to next? Their little lives are exceptional already, and as social networking has become the norm, I have a feeling there will be a connection between them for many years to come.

I board a plane in three hours for Beijing, China. Two of the girls could not come (much, much, much to my dismay), so it will be an Ambercation instead of a girlcation. Stay tuned for a report on Peking duck and the Forbidden City.

My Sanctuary

Remember this carving Axel did in Nepal? I finally stained it and made it into a headboard. The pictures don't give you a full appreciation of the carving itself, but the bed turned out quite nice. I am happy with it. You can also see the sheep skin Axel and I bought at the souq. I love it, and so does my dog.

I also had a Potterybarn chair copied while I was in Nepal. I love it. It holds all the reject clothing for the evening. Isn't that what a bedroom chair is for?

I realize the room is in dire need of paint color. I am holding out. I keep thinking a move is around the corner. I may just paint the walls anyways. The minute the room is complete, the movers will be coming. That's just how my life works.

Boy's Night

Heavah was recently invited to a compound girl's party. I was excited to have one less body in the house because Axel was out for the weekend. The news of this party didn't go over well with Xavier and he pleaded with me to have a few boys over to watch a movie. I was distracted and listened with only half my brain. The other half was screaming, "Hello? Are you listening? A few boys in place of my fairly low-key daughter? Don't do it! Don't do it!'

When I finally went in the house this is what I found:

11 boys all under the age of 9

To be fair, it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. A little sugar, a Star Wars movie and an impromptu pillow fight took care of the evening just fine. It was better than emotional breakdowns and nailpolish.Oh, how I love boys.

My Favorite Corner

So far, this place makes me happy.

More to come...

Making Our Mark

We were in the house less than 12 hours and the destruction began.  Heavah and Sedona decided to play a little game of tag.  Sedona had a great idea of locking herself in the storage closet.  The only problem is she did not have the dexterity to get herself out of the closet.  

After leaving her in the room for well over an hour hoping she would gain super strength and turn the key, we shamefully called the maintenance service thinking they might have an extra key.  Not so.

When they arrived they first tried to disassemble the lock:

No luck.  Without any warning they began to bash the door to pieces.  Desperate measures...

Which resulted in feelings of this:

 

...and this...

We needed to make our house feel like ours.  Who needs centerpieces and art when you have children who can make every inch of the home theirs?  Bashed doors and all.

Al Fardan

                              A stand alone in a compound 

Axel and I were determined to move into a home near Axel's work.  Traffic in Doha is a beast and I didn't want the little time that Axel had in Qatar spent in a car.  An hour is precious for our family when you consider he is gone 4 days out of the week. 

After looking at a number of homes we came up with nothing.  The perfect place (or at least seemed to be perfect) was fully occupied and we were running out of ideas.  On the way home from work one day a Real Estate agent brought Axel to an Al Fardan compound.  The Al Fardan compounds have an excellent reputation.  I wasn't too sure about compound idea.  It just seemed too close for comfort. 

 

Before the agent brought Axel to the compound he had this really strong feeling that this was going to be the place.  The minute he walked in he knew that the house would accommodate our family just fine.   It was where we needed to be, no denying it.  I had no idea why, but it was the place. 

I went to church on Sunday to tell people we were moving into the Al Fardan complex only to find out that we have 3 LDS neighbours!  All our children are close in age and we are all either across the street or right beside each other.   In fact, a Muslim family down the road said, 'We can't believe that there are more Mormon families on this street than Muslims!'  It was then followed with, '...which is great because we share a lot of the same beliefs and moral standards.'   It has become our little Utah in Doha.

So far, it has been surreal living here.  If you close your eyes and ignore the daily prayers on the loud speakers from the mosque, you can easily pretend you are in some American suburb. In fact, we were here for only a week and we were invited to a October Conference dinner while the broadcast was on TV.  Our kids play outside with their friends every evening and our doorbell is always ringing.  It has been such a stark difference to what we experienced in Nepal.  They both have pluses and minuses, but I think this is what our family needed for this time. 

Here are some visuals of the house.  The pictures are of the main floor.  I will send others as we get our stuff and after my weekly maid cleans the rooms. 

 

The Office

Downstairs bathroom

Kitchen

 

Living Room 

Dining Room

I know this is the right place for us now and I also know it won't be long before we are packing this place up to head off to another country.  I desperately miss my life in Nepal, but for now, this will work just fine.