Back to Utah

This is Axel again. After the trip to Seattle and saying goodbye to Danny, Linda and Karen there, we came back down for the last week of the trip. It is so tough to be in the last week. Each day brings you closer back to reality. This leg of the trip was geared for friends. My best friend from EL, Dave Alizo "Bizz" came to visit me. During his trip we went to go see MoTab as he is a big music fan and tour around Temple Square on his last day. We also went hunting in Manti and drove up to the mountains. It was all great.
I remember standing there with 4 fewer kids, 4 fewer school degrees, a lot less money and yet still the same hot, young wife I had on my marriage day. How did I change and she only got better?
This is Dave, My Mom and Xay after the Spoken Word concert. It was amazing to see them live in the conference center. It was my first time in the conference center and I was moved to tears a few times it was so beautiful. Dave turned to me a few times and told me things about MoTab I didn't even know. He loved it too.
Honestly I can't say enough about my relationship with Dave. We met in high school on the freshmen football bench. I was short and fat and Dave was bigger and protective. We laughed there and started hanging out from then on. I am not one for many friends. I like lots of people, but I am very guarded about who I let in as a friend. I guess that is primarily becuase I started off with such a great one. I know there is nothing Dave wouldn't do for me and the same is true of me. It kills me to live so far away from him. I have no secrets from him and I always get the best advice about anything big or small. If you know him, than I am quiet sure you love him. He was like a second big brother to all my brothers and sisters, and his mom is one of the most amazing people I know. She raised him to be 'old school'. He holds doors, is always respectful to older people (which is getting harder and harder for us to find) and is always great to little children. He speaks Spanish like a native, but didn't start even learning it until after high school, he composes his own music (he is starting a fusion of blue grass and Latin music now that sounds amazing!) and all of it he just taught himself becuase he wanted to. All of this isn't even the tip of the iceberg about him - I could write a whole book on the subject. I love him like a brother.
I also had the great opportunity to touch bases with my fellow Jerusalem Center Intesive Arabic class of 1993. This get together was put together by my great friend Todd Cummings (on the far left), who was my roommate there. So he has a bit of dirt on me... He was my best friend there and we have stayed great friends ever since. He has since become a corporate trainer for his own company he started and comes to the ME often (actually he will be back here for some more training this month and we are so looking forward to seeing him again!) He invited a few of the other Arabic students and our teacher for 6 months; Dan Peterson and his wonderful wife Debbie and two of their three sons.

If you are Mormon then you have probably heard of Dan Peterson. He does a lot of projects from defending the church, working closely with FARMS and still teaching Arabic at BYU. The guy speaks like 10 languages and a few of them are dead ones (honestly, who still understands Akkadian?). Let me just tell you, if you only know him from his writings and genius, then you don't know the greatest thing about the guy and his family. When I came to Jerusalem I had just experienced the death of my two brothers Asa and Calder. My dad had a head wound and my mom was dealing with some seriously hard issues. When I got to the J Center, I had hair down past my shoulders, wore my leather motorcycle jacket around and already had an Israeli girlfriend who was in the IDF (I came a week early). Honestly, I was a mess dealing with the loss of my family in more ways than one.

Dan and his wife Debbie stepped right in to be more than teachers, they became a second family. I look back and at that time and he was younger then than I am now. He was always there for me. He overlooked the things I did wrong and praised me for the few things I could do right. His wife always gave me hugs (which I needed in the worst way) but also didn't have any problems telling me when I was out of line. And his three sons were there to help me play with and deal with the loss of my two younger brothers. I just love his family and it was so nice to see them all again.

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Back to Terah to complete this blog. Ugh, sorry. We are manic these days with catching up and all...

Also while we were in Utah we visited with my sister-in-law Shauna. She is one of the most pleasant people you will ever meet. Her heart is big and her strength is amazing. Although her and my brother are divorced, I won't accept the fact that she is not my sister. I have too much love and admiration for her. While in college I was poor and directionless. Shauna and Chad opened their doors for me and allowed for me to live with them for years. Yes, years. I don't know if I could ever do that for a family member. She had so much patience when my boyfriends would call late and night and wake her babies, or when I would come home in the wee hours at night and no matter how hard I tried, those wood floors would creek so loud I swore I woke their neighbors 5 doors down. I think of the carefree college-aged Terah and I quite sure I would have kicked her out after the first month. Not Shauna.

Instead, she always emphasized that family was first and that I was always welcomed in her home. For that, I will always be indebted to her. Her home was always a place of refuge for me whenever I was lonely or missed my family back in Canada. I could count on her to open her doors and allow me all the freedom that a young 20 something needed. These examples barely scratch the surface for all that Shauna has done for me and my family. I love her so much and I was so blessed to see her in Utah. Currently she is an airline stewardess and seems to really love what she does. I couldn't be happier for her.

As my children grow older I am fascinated by the other 50% of them that isn't me. So many parts of them are curious to me and sometimes surprise me. It is one of the joys of my life to watch my children behave or act in a totally different manner than myself. Sometimes this is positive, sometimes not. Whatever it may be, it intrigues me and makes life more exciting. I think I always thought I would just have clones of myself, which is a rather scary thought and thank goodness it didn't work out that way.

One of the interesting things that came from my trip to Utah was to see the other 50% manifest itself in other children or adults in Axel's family. Whether it was a physical trait or personality trait, it was so much fun to see the genetic overlap of the cousins and siblings. I never got to look at my progeny in such a way as I did while I was in Utah. Seeing the children find similarity (spoken or unspoken) was such an eye opening thing not only for me, but also my children.

Luckily, I married well. My husband has a lovely family full of quirks and strengths that are exceptional on both sides of the scale. They have big hearts, they have an affinity for nature, they excel in scholastics, they cook well, they tolerate chaos, they love conversation, they empathize, they forgive, they discuss politics, they play instruments, they are faithful, they love little children, they execute plans, etc. It was delightful to see how those strengths played out in Axel's family and how I found similarities in myself and also differences. It was a joy to make connections in my children that I never knew before. It was a discovery that was beautiful and surprising. I found that so many of Axel's family's qualities were reflected in my children that I admire, I love and I am thankful.

It is a divine thing to see how God can perpetuate the great strengths from one generation to another. I am proud that I chose well enough to have my children inherit such wonderful qualities. For example, Anna, Axel's sister had us live in her home for over 3 weeks. That seems like a natural familial duty to most until you find out that she has 7 children of her own, two of which are barely a year old. Her family's kindness and generosity was overwhelming. This example and a billion more exist with Axel's family. They are a strong, intelligent and engaging group of people who can be kind, loving and forgiving. I am just lucky enough to have elements of that reflected in my own home, 4 times over.

Keith, Anna, baby Ada, Sedona and baby Gabe